HI!!!!!

I don’t know what is up with all these blog posts but I say ENJOY EM while they last. Yesterday I decided that I couldn’t live another day without house slippers so I got bundled up and took a marsh to the big market in new Rustavi.  Well, let me tell you that not only did I find super awesome red “leather” slippers with super thick soles but I also found *drum roll please* HANGERS. I was very excited so I bought 10.  Then I went into another store to pick up some shampoo and I found more hangers there so I bought another 6.  It literally felt like Christmas I was so damn happy!  I also happened to find a random tanning bed in the basement of a beauty shop.  I don’t know what the big deal with Tbilisi is anyway; Rustavi just kicked its ass two-fold in a matter of minutes.  I then proceeded to skip home filled with glee! 

This morning I got hug/kiss assaulted by a group of kids right as I walked in the school door as their mothers said hello and laughed as I struggled to get past the ever growing ring of children that have now formed a human hoola hoop around me.  This continued in the halls during “recess” and in each of my classes. Oh my little bacteria machines how much I have missed your little arms around me. My first class today was grade 2 which has 'HI' in it -- a little boy I have mentally named that.  Here is a picture of him I took before I went on break.

(He looks so scared in this picture)

Here’s a little background on Denis—I learned his name today.  *pause* ok so before I tell the story I want to explain why it is pretty much February and I just learned his name today.  I teach 13 different classes with anywhere from 15 to 32 students in each class.  It is almost impossible for me to learn that many names especially if some of them I only see once a week. So back to my little lovable Russian—I also found that out today… well not found out more so confirmed because he looks Russian compared to all the kids around him with dark hair and eyes. At the beginning of the year, there were some issues with my schedule as I wasn’t in every class.  There would be this one little kid who I didn’t teach that would always run up and say hi to me.  I didn’t even know if he went to the school because he would always say hi to me outside or near the buildings by the bus stop.  As I would be getting to school, he would run up to me and yell hi then run away. Other times, I would be waiting for the bus, he would run up and scream hi and then run away.  Then run halfway back, say hi then run away again. This would continue 3 or 4 times everytime I saw him. There was one time I saw him with his grandma coming out of the store; he let go of her hand, ran over to me, screamed hi and ran back to his grandmother.  Initially, I was like what is going on? Who is this kid? but after a while I would crack up laughing every time he did it and found it so endearing. This went on for a couple of weeks until one day I get my new schedule and go to this grade 2 class and there he is in all his 'HI' glory. So today when I walked into the class, his head could have EXPLODED he was so excited to see me.  Up he jumped from his desk, screamed hi as he ran over and leapt onto me.  We get the class settled and I put down my bag on the teacher’s desk then look up to see him looking at me, as he is doing this little "seductive" hi wave with a half smile.  I couldn’t contain myself and burst out laughing.  It was honestly the best way I could have started my day.

Back to School

My first weekend was okay—Friday I had spent the night in Tbilisi in a hostel with fellow group 24ers Petey and Nikhil.  It was nice to catch up a bit but it still made me miss home.  I know I’ll get out of this funk and I really am getting better but… meh. Maybe it is the weather too. It’s cold, snowy, icy and grey so I’m trying to cheer myself up by wearing as much color as possible.  I should make rainbow colored glasses and just wear them around like Elton John.  That actually makes a lot of sense. Maybe he wears those glasses because he doesn’t like the way the world is colored. Maybe that is why Stevie Wonder wears sunglasses all the time too! *crickets* Or maybe he just likes being in the dark? With that last comment I am sure that I just secured myself a first class ticket to Hell.

Saturday was spent walking around Tbilisi looking for hangers.  I actually had a drawing of a hanger, the transliterated Georgian word for hanger, the word then written in Georgian and the Russian word for hanger written in Georgian and all I could find were a 3-pack of little kid hangers in ONE store.  I guess people just don’t use them here.  Saturday I was in bed and asleep by 10pm like a little old lady. 

Sunday I woke up at 7am watched the first 4 episodes of Project Runway All Stars, downloaded a few movies (just in case I experience another internet black out period) and took a shower.   Yes taking a shower seems to be enough of an event that I must report on it.  I then get a call from my sanity giver, Duncan, and I go into Tbilisi for the afternoon to catch up on the happenings of the past 7 weeks.  We both are in the same funk so it was nice to have someone understand in the same position. You know what they say, “Misery likes company” but it our meeting didn’t consist of us bitching, we were more so discussing our feelings. Sunday night was the highlight of my weekend.  No I wasn’t out drinking wine. I got to talk to my papa bear and my cousin for a few hours and we got into planning our 2012 Eurotrip.  I told my dad about my predicament and he hold me to buy a broom handle and get some shoelaces and make my own hanger.  I’m not going to lie—it was a pretty good idea but at the same time, I don’t need hangers THAT bad and can just settle for folding dress shirts… or use the 4 hangers I have and put 30 pounds of clothes on each.  He is legit one of the funniest people I know.

My arrival back to school was a very warm one. Everyone was very inviting and excited that I had returned as the English teacher before me had not come back after the winter break.  I got plenty of hugs and kisses from the students and got to see Goga (the keeper of my heart).  *sigh* I actually feel so much better right now it is unbelievable!  Being back in school makes my heart wanna explode with bliss.  One of my co-teachers had taught them the full version to ‘We wish you a Merry Christmas’ which they sang to me to welcome me back.  I was AGAIN fighting back tears.  This girl in grade 3 today calls me over during the work period and says “Herta mas, I love you.” That alone makes life worth living. These kids mean so much to me and its incredible to think that I probably mean a lot to them too.

Now with that being said I thought I'd lighten the mood by sharing some funny clips from Billy Madison (back when Adam Sandler used to be funny).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dncx6O5J4U&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eD8_XO29_oA&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJf8Je5H7-k&feature=related

Return to the RU

I got back on Wednesday and pretty much spent the entire day sleeping—except for 3 hours which were used for unpacking and taking a hot bath in the Jacuzzi tub.  It feels very strange to be here. The first time around I was filled with excitement and wonder as I knew nothing and no one.  Now, I am missing Toronto and everyone in it. Ugh. I know this feeling is going to go away but it sucks while you’re experiencing it.  Next week is February… I cannot believe a month has gone by in 2012.  Seriously though, where does time go? I wonder if it is recycled in some near yet distant universe.  I’m having an issue with my Geocell phone as I can’t text and lord knows I hate actually hearing peoples voices!  I’m going to have to go to one of their branches and get this shit sorted out.

I really can’t wait to get back into the swing of things with school and friends—kind of. Ugh. I’m in a weird mood probably because I had weird dreams / nightmares last night; I don’t understand how it is pretty much the same types of nightmares every time! It’s always me running away from someone who is trying to kill me. ALWAYS. They never do end up killing me but it’s the running and hiding in darkness that really freaks me out.  I legit get scared when I watch Snow White or Beauty and the Beast so imagine how scared I am when it’s not a cartoon on the TV but a psychopath with a knife or gun in my head.

I started watching Lord of the Rings seeing as I don’t have school until Monday, my phone is crazy and the net is dead for a few days (apparently someone broke the modem). The movies are super long! I’m currently halfway through the second film and every couple of minutes that weird creature keeps saying Gollum, Gollum, Gollum and I can’t stop laughing.  Once again this damn time difference is killing me! Woke up at 6am today, fell back asleep around 11 and woke up at 6 in the afternoon. I wanna get outta the house tomorrow and get a few things done – first things first, I need to get the damn texting issue fixed ASAP, I gotta buy some hangers and maybe if I am lucky find someone to give me a full body rub down as my back feels like it is going to rip apart. I need to stop using a pillow.

To everyone reading this I would love for you to send me movie … not requests… but… wtf is the other thing called… the word escapes me.. OH YES.. recommendations.  Seeing as it is cold outside and I will not have much to do for the next couple of weeks I’d love to watch some movies that people really enjoyed.  You can either post them here as comments or facebook them to me but preferably not anything “epic-y” like Lord of the Rings as there is too much grey and weird ass names/words.  I had to start watching it with subtitles to keep up with all this Saruman and Soroman shit.  *direct question for Raul—have you seen Lord of the Rings? Because Gollum whose name is now Seamgol just said “we must go now” and I almost dyed of laughter because I imagined you and your creepy voice saying it* 

Question for all those who have seen LOTR—ok so you know how Saruman—the dude with the long white hair—started birthing those… warrior creatures from the mud… to make his ultimate army of fighters… and he like made tens of thousands of them… WHYYYYYY THEN didn’t the good guys do the same? Is it because good army people cant be birthed out of the mud? So get some nice white Cuban sand or something! Birth them out of swan feathers—I don’t know! Do something instead of grabbing a couple of 4 foot hobbits and a crook eyed, overly masculine, overly blood thirsty gremlin/dwarf master to fight an army of evil mud creatures!!  

I just finished watching the complete LOTR saga and lemme just say that i will never ever be able to get those 10+ hours of my life back. Thank you very much to all the hobbits, gollums and fire eyes that made this possible!  

A very "TENYLEG" Holiday Season

What a wonderful break!  I would never have imagined coming home for the holidays could be so great—granted I hardly saw any friends *sorry to everyone for my ghosty-ness*.  I just got to Istanbul (well, not really, I'm currently back in Rustavi but I wrote this in Istanbul), ahead of schedule, which means my layover is even longer.  I got a good bit of sleep on the plane ride over from Toronto by building myself a mini fort made of pillows but all I want right now is to lie down on the floor on my jacket and sleep in the middle of the airport like a beggar. *long pause* No? Just me?

So I got to Toronto on December 10 and started my rounds of epic surprises as no one knew I was coming home.  I will forever remember the way Dezso’s  (cousin) face dropped when he came in through the door and I was standing in the hallway. Silly goose, I can’t believe you thought that my dad would have left you alone for 2 weeks during the holidays to go to Cubanos.  I never imagined that Dezso and I could get any closer, but this 6 week period of time was just what we needed to mesh into one big pile of Bolgar family awesomeness. That night we went out to eat which is when the reverse culture shock hit me—I really think that buffets should be illegal as no healthy person enjoys gorging on food for a couple of hours (HA! says the person who gained 40 pounds during the break thanks to my incessant need to take my cousin to “new places” aka Taco Bell, Greek food, Quiznos, Bubble Tea, KFC, McDonalds, Wings… the list of delicious fried foods and high calorie delicacies could go on and on).  *cue irrelevant funny story* So this one evening we are coming home from god knows where and we get in the elevator to go up to the apartment.  It stops on the first floor and this man and an older lady step in.  They press the button and smile at us; as we are going up—he looks at me and goes, “Is that your son?” and gestures towards Dezso.  I was DUMBFOUNDED.  1. Dezso is 2 years older than me-- 2. How old does Dezso look?-- ANNNNNNNNND 3. HOW OLD DO I LOOK?!

I got to surprise a bunch of Fazoolis co-workers at a Boxing Day party. We all exchanged boxes. I’m actually hysterically laughing. *deep sigh* I REALLY NEED A BED.  I also got to surprised my light, Albart, by jumping out from behind the couch after he had gotten home from a long day at work.  I am so grateful that Alex and he are in my life as when they are around, it is days upon days of hilarity and awesome conversation.  GULUM! Merlin the Wizard, Marry the Night, the night we SPEAK NOT about-- PRISMS everywhere, “Get Jenny on the phone”, growing up in a hard neighbourhood while being a huge gangsta—then I remember that  Albart is the biggest poin-dexter there is. “Do you know what John Lennon did when he was faced with adversity?” “I dunno. What? DIED?!”

Albart- “Questions? Questions? Does anyone have any questions? You can ask anything!”
Alex- (who had been silent for 2 hours) “No Albart, no one has any questions! We’ve established that hours ago as no one has asked you any questions!”
Albart – “But the question is… do you have a question?”

Over the 2 week Christmas/New Year holidays I was super busy as Dezso and I wanted to get a lot of stuff done in a super short period of time.  We got to check out the CN Tower and the Science Center, both places were much cooler and more interesting when I was a kid.  We also went to the Royal Ontario Museum—we totally loved it there but didn’t have enough time to check EVERYTHING out.  While up in the CN Tower, we wanted to see the sunset and Toronto skyline at night so we just walked around and around until the sun decided to get it’s big, hot ass to sleep. We went to Castle Loma, saw a magic show, walked around downtown on Christmas day, checked out China Town while on the hunt for a lit up Christmas tiger which we never ended up finding.

New Years was spent in Mississauga with the boys as per our tradition; I do believe this is the 6^th year we have celebrated the countdown together. For any Canadians reading this, they brought back Electric Circus for the night on Much Music.  In all fairness, I have no idea why they brought it back as it was HORRIBLE and really boring to watch.

We hung out at the Toronto Zoo one day looking for potential beaver and moose mates for Dezso seeing as he likes a woman with STRONG teeth!  It was semi-cold and wet that day which I am POSITIVE what made me become deathly ill the next week.  I thoroughly enjoyed celebrating the first week of 2012 in bed super sick, sleeping 17 hours a day like a sloth.  But then again, I had to get healthy as I was going to CUBBBBBA the next week.

I can’t thank my Papa Bear enough for surprising Dezso and I with a weeklong vacation in Varadero.  We spent the majority of our time soaking in the sun by the pool and beach— I really enjoy the beach in theory, in actuality not so much, as I really haven’t worked out my feelings on sand.  I mean, it’s great when you are dry and you can just brush it off but for anyone that knows me, I am legit part sea loin.  Have fun getting rid of sand on your body, on the beach as your wet.  Whatever, I’m just being a DIVA right now.  I would take being covered head to sea-loin toe in sand while wet over snow and gusty winds any day!  I got Dezso really into mojitos and pina coladas— this is the only time in life that I prefer anything a virgin seeing as Rum in Cuba flows pretty much like water!  We enjoyed the hotel entertainment which ranged from the animation dance team to beached whale watching to the large group of crazy 19 year old Quebec-ions who loved to be as ridiculous and drunk as possible.  For years now I always thought that renting the scooters in Cuba was a bad idea— a friend had told me how she had rode into a pothole and really messed up her leg as the bike fell over and skidded; then there was this time that my dad decided to rent one and he flew through a bunch of bushes the second he got on—so when Dezso was like I wanna rent one, I was like *ugh* we are going to die.  But we didn’t die and had a wonderful day riding around Varadero and the surrounding area—it got even better  the second we discovered that there were little foot holds for me as I was hanging onto the back of the scooter for half the day scared that the exhaust was going to burn off my ankle.  The weather was not the best Cuba could offer a few days, thus luckily on poopy days we got to explore the resort and watch 3-4 of the same movies 7 times thanks to HBO Plus.

My last weekend home was spent in Niagara Falls with Dezso on the Friday. Lucky for us it was one of the coldest days since my arrival back in Canada—and then with the boys on Saturday.  It was a lovely weekend to end a wonderful trip.  I seriously do not think I have slept to my little hearts content since BEFORE Cuba! It seems so weird that I went home on vacation… no? just me? I find it very interesting that for the first couple of weeks that I was home, I would non-stop talk about Georgia—the friends I miss, the places I visited, the food I love—but as the weeks quickly passed I wanted nothing more but to stay in Toronto and be with my family/friends.  It seems surreal that I was even home and got to see a couple of people that I enjoy.  Once again, I do sincerely apologize to everyone that I didn’t get to see for whatever reason.  As weird as it seems, all I wanted to do was hang out and relax as I am always doing something or going somewhere during my free time in the George.  Going to Georgia was the best decision I ever made but it can become rather difficult as you are constantly surrounded by people that don’t actually KNOW you.  Being around family and friends puts my personhood (is that even a word?) back in check.   I never realized how much I actually missed people until I reconnected with their spirits.  People change but their core persona stays pretty much the same.  It was so nice to talk to and connect with people that know a part of me that can’t necessarily express in Georgia.  With that being said, I am very excited to go back to teaching and to see all my students.  I am excited to see and hug my host family as they are one of the best things that could have come out of this experience.    

You Are My Sunshine

Today in one of my grade 2 classes that I hadn't seen for a while, a little boy named Nika stood up and started reciting "You Are My Sunshine" (did you know that that song has OTHER lyrics!? I DIDN'T!!) Well Nika knew them by heart and sang them while looking me in the eyes.  It was honestly the cutest and sweetest thing to watch him.  I never ever want to forget that moment.  

 

This week has been a tough one with all the running around I have been doing.  We have "Foreign Languages Week" happening at my school whereby teachers hold open lessons. What is an open lesson you ask? Well it is the dumbest thing in the world.  Basically a teacher picks one of her "good" classes and invites other teachers, the parents, the vice principal and principal to watch the class while "teaching". The thing is, it is ALL fake-- and everyone involved knows it.  It's a fake lesson in that the kids are trained for about a week or so as to what to expect.  So all the material, activities and who says what, where and when had already been predetermined AND rehearsed.  Since I am queen of resources I have 4 different teachers asking me to make certain types of flashcards, posters, banners, find these types of videos, find those songs, make this kind of PP presentation all of course LAST MINUTE.  Don't get me wrong though, I love doing this stuff but a. not so last minute and b. not the same week as I am working on teachers college applications.  OISE OFFICIALLY SUBMITTED :) 

Which brings me back to why I am writing this-- Nika totally made me forget all my own issues with the way he sang my favourite song to me with his cute little face and those eyes that melted my heart. 

(Nika my little ball of sunshine)

(For anyone that is interested the other lyrics are here)

The other night dear, as I lay sleeping

I dreamed I held you in my arms
But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken
So I hung my head and I cried.
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You'll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K480BTMTpvo&feature=related

sakhlshi gogos

Friday after school, I spent the afternoon trying to sleep. TRYING being the key term.  If it wasn’t people calling me, it was text messages making my phone go off every 20 minutes.  I felt like I was back in Toronto—not in a good way. Why I didn’t just turn it off you ask—what if someone was getting killed is my question to you. YOU EVER THINK OF THAT?! So after about 2 hours of struggling to sleep and getting more and more angry at my phone I decided it was time to get up, get ready and head to Tbilisi to hang out with a friend I hadn’t seen in a few weeks. Once I am in Tbilisi it takes us (I kid you not) 30 minutes to find each other since I do not know how to describe my whereabouts on the phone—apparently, “I’m standing next to the massive concrete asteroid hole that is covered by metal” wasn’t clear enough.  We then enjoy some food, wine and a cup of tea.

Saturday KUTAISI day! I get to see Erica and Clare with my main goooogoooo Eva.  We get to the station around 11ish and off we go on a lovely marsh to Kutaisi around noon.  The ride was relatively pleasant.  I got to take a nap while our driver blared a mix between Georgian music and possibly a variety show he had taped 20 years ago.  We get to Kutaisi around 4ish to find home girls (sakhlshi gogos) hanging out at Mcdonalds (one of the only interesting local attractions), hung over and about 3 minutes… HA… away from death.  We run into some other TLGers who are so quiet that I am sure they had developed an intricate code of blinks to communicate.  “What do they talk about AIR?” We get to see the lovely Katherine and Lora, hang out for 5 minutes and go off to find Giorgi’s Homestay.  Once there we get comfortable, we swap some stories about how Erica is a cock blocker and other entertaining events.

(my thumb looks like a penis)

“I don’t know how or why you put up with her; I would literally just fart AT her.  I do it to guests at the restaurant when I want them to leave.  If you are ever eating out and smell something weird, its most likely that the servers do not like you.”  During this time we hear very odd noises outside that turn out to be aliens prepping our room for an invasion. We get ready and go out to dinner.  Dinner was great as we found ourselves at a random restaurant with live music but no singing until an old man was opera-ing later on. They had some chicken salad that was out of this world.  Luckily, we were almost done eating by the time Georgian Andrea Bocelli came on. 

(If IKEA made furniture out of rocks)

(dancing partner)

 We head back to the homestay as we know we have a long day ahead of us as we were planning to check out these super cool caves and dinosaur footprints in Satapila (about 7km away).

Sunday we wake up to hear the most intense rain ever. Bye bye, dinasour footprints L I aint walking around in the rain looking like some rejected frog.  So we slowly, but surely get up head back to the same restaurant from the previous night for the chicken salad.  We then hop on the #1 bus which takes us back to McDonalds (which also happens to be the marsh station).  The ride to Tbilisi was just leaving so we quickly say our goodbye and hop on a huge double decker tour bus.  Eva and I get on, and of course I fall asleep like I always do. I wake up to the feeling that I am sliding so I sit up and notice that my seat is LITERALLY not attached to the bus—so if I was let’s say a chicken, I could lay an egg and it would just fall down into *hopefully* a soft pillow waiting on the floor.  I then move seats to sit right next to Eva... and during one of the tour bus stops a man sits RIGHT next to me even though there was an empty spot next to him. For the following 2 hours I had to endure his elbow in my side, my hands by my "butt thigh" and finally him using my thigh as an arm rest.  Initially I was annoyed and kept moving away.  It would seem like he got the point until he would change his touching tactics.  By the end, Eva and I were literally in hysterics laughing at how ridiculous he was. After almost 6 hours on this brutal bus we finally get to Tbilisi and hopped on a marsh back to Rustavi amazed that we got nothing accomplished other then getting felt up by a man that was half bird.

All Hallows Eve

Halloween weekend in Tbilisi really was not as fun as I had expected.  I hate building things up in my mind and then being let down—that probably explains why I have such low expectations. Anyway, I dressed up as Mr. Jolly—a character from the first English World Book (the shitty book we use to teach).  Best Costume Ever! But when Halloween isn’t an event or even holiday in Georgia, you look mighty crazy walking around with baby powder in your hair and eyebrows in the middle of a Saturday night while everyone else is in fashion-ista gear. 

Friday, Duncan and I took the marsh into Tbilisi together, got to Big Star hostel and chilled for a little bit with his lady love and some other chick that is RATHER bland.  Next thing I know I am in the room with bland-o for what seemed like eternity and I realize that these fools “left me in the room to DIE”. I find the love birds and invite myself along to their date but decide not to be a cock blocker for too long and go chill with the rugby crew.

(Not a wig, its a hat. A hat that I MUST have)

Saturday I got to sleep in until 2—it felt like heaven! I got up, hung out then went to a late lunch / early dinner with Nikhil (a friend I met in training).  We swap Georgia stories and polish off a bottle of delicious semi-sweet red wine. I then head back to the hostel to get ready for what I thought was going to be an EPIC night. As I am getting ready, I start to meet new TLGers which is always interesting as you never know what you are going to get.  I am really interested to meet the people that DID NOT qualify to teach in Georgia because there seem to be PLENTY of “all-star” characters in the mix.  BOOGLES THE MIND.   There is a mini pre-party at the hostel and I get to meet my internet “arch nemesis”.  This dude is from Welsh and as loonie as they come.  *pause* Is welsh the country or is welsh what you are when you come from Welshland? Anyway, after a few beers, I tell him that I think he is crazy as fuck but that we should get over our rivalry—as long as he tones down the “I’m a proud Welsh person bullshit”.  By this time, the majority of the people that were at the pre-party left to go elsewhere; I am secretly happy as I was in no mood to spend my night with them.  ISSUE! Once we are ready to go, we have lost the ENTIRE crowd which means we are going from place to place, checking things out LOOKING LIKE A SMALL PACK OF LUNATICS—with masks on and baby powdered ass hair.  We slowly but surely, give up and head over to my favourite hooka bar. Yes friends, the one with the tattooed arm boy. LOVE HIM.  By this point, I order a beer, slowly sip it but I feel SOOOOOOOOO SICK. Time to call it a night!

 

(this is my only picture of the night!)

What’s a weekend in Tbilisi without a RUGBY GAME; so on Sunday, I went to see one. BORING. I spent the entire time texting and calling people.  Later, Duncan and I thought it would be a good idea to spend the night in Tbilisi and just go to school straight in the morning. BAD IDEA. I could not wake him up for the life of me, so I then left him… TO DIE… in Tbilisi and slowly but surely made my way back to the RU just in time for school.

Monday night then rolls around and I think I am going to have a nice, relaxing quiet night in. WRONG. I get some dates mixed up and realize that Kathryn (the chick that I switched spots with back in training) is flying back into Tbilisi TONIGHT.  Her grandpa had passed away 2 weeks back so she had left urgently to attend the funeral.  I did not want her coming back into Georgia with no familiar face at the airport.  So BACK I went to Tbilisi. I met up with Lora, another friend who was there to greet her and hung out at Friends Hostel until her 4am flight came in.  It was so nice seeing her! She was so surprised! We headed over to our favourite place and enjoyed some wine at 5:30 in the morning.  I got to see an awesome sunrise on my marsh ride home.  Good times in Georgia!